Excuse me, ma'am? I have several complaints. Okay, I have three, but they're pretty substantial. Please stop rifling through your papers and pretend that you care. Thank you.
Okay. First, I have these two cats, that I absolutely adore. But the sleep deprivation! It's not right. I'm going to have a baby in approximately four weeks. Shouldn't I get to sleep a little until then? That's what I thought too. But these cats, you see, fight all night long. *Thump, thump, thump* running through the house. *Low growl* coming from my little girl cat. *Howl* from the boy cat. *Thump thump thump* and it begins again. This morning, I was blaming it all on the boy cat, when my little Diva started chasing him! Sometimes I feel worse for our downstairs neighbor than I do myself. And, no. It doesn't seem to disturb my husband. In fact, he's still sleeping.
Second, I had no idea my job was going to be this stressful. I'm a peon. Hmm. I'm not even sure my status merits that title. Perhaps I'm the equivalent of the Middle Ages surf? Most days, I absolutely sunshine and rainbows love my job. But this past week? Not so much. I've done a ton of work, receiving modest credit and a ton of blame. Does that make it a little clearer? No? Well, you know that adage - Don't shoot the messenger? I'm the messenger and need to be treated for spiritual bullet wounds. Seriously, it's not that bad. And you're right, ma'am: I should be grateful that I have a job. In particular a this time of year. It's just that people can be so darned mean; especially via email. I think it's easy to forget that there's an actual person behind that address. Okay, I feel better about that one. I'll let that go.
Last, heartburn is just so sucky. Oh, thank you for your sympathy. I didn't realize that the only thing the doesn't cause heartburn is sleeping. And I guess I didn't realize that because those two black and white cats don't let me sleep. The other day, I think I gulped too much air, you know, more than my due. And the burn! It raged on and on. I'm pretty sure I've invested more in Tums over the past few months than I did in Christmas gifts.
Other than that, everything is going great. Thanks so much for your time. Of course I'll go up to room 915 and fill out form 1790.
***See? I can complain with the best of them. But really, I'm feeling great and things are mostly faboo. Four day weekends are awesome! We have a CPR class today, which we're excited about. I've just gotten hooked on House. Hmm, what else? Not too much. I hope you all have a Happy Holiday season!***