My Really Bad TV Confession Part I

I love The Ghost Whisperer. There. I said it. Look, I know it's a terrible show. I know, but there's something about it that I really like. I think it's the relationship between Jim and Melinda. What's not to like? It's a trashy romance novel with ghosts.

Whenever the Ghost Whisperer is on, The Targo runs and mutters unkind things under his breath. But still I watch. And I love it.

What's your guilty pleasure?

Bullets, Snippets, Kitties, Oh My!

• Is anyone else as hooked on American Idol as I am this season? I thought the top 24, with a few WTF exceptions, was the most talented ever. I'm sad every week when someone gets eliminated. Except for those exceptions noted above. Two of the people I was sure would be in the top three are gone. (I'm pretty sure Kristabella single handedly eliminated Carly.) And I'm fascinated by the washed up crazies (and Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber) they've had coaching the finalists. But, seriously, Carly did the same arrangement of Jesus Christ, Superstar that Laura from the Grease show did. And let me just say, Laura was way better. WAY.
• I've lost 15 lbs of my baby weight. I had always heard rumors of those women who wore their pre-pregnancy jeans home from the hospital. Maybe they weren't 32 and maybe they hadn't had C-sections. Or maybe they were my insanely skinny even at 64 mother-in-law. Maybe. I blame my SLOW, very very slow, return to not-so-grande-ness on the crappy weather in Chicago. I barely left my house in February because it was so damned cold. Most of March wasn't much better. And the first two weeks of April saw both Nathan and myself with colds. And now I'm back to work. I try to get out for a mile walk every day, but it doesn't always work. Nap time and all.
• I have secret fantasies of all of my favorite bloggers moving to Chicagoland. I think Kristabella would find this very funny, considering I can't keep a date with her to save my life.
• This morning, I had Nathan on the floor, playing on his mat. Magic, being a FREAK SHOW, had the zooms and kept hurdling over the baby. I almost killed him, but I've seen how the Humane Society goes after people on the news.
• Because I'm boring, and still have no idea where the camera is, I will leave you with an old Nathan picture:

I May or May Not Have Taken Your Advice

Either way ... no baby.

So, have any of you seen MonsterQuest on the History Channel? I 100% admit that The Targo and I are nerds and that our TiVo is filled with History Channel and Travel Channel shows. We're super fun.

MonsterQuest has to be the funniest show on television right now. Essentially, the show looks at "monster" sitings all over the world, brings in scientific experts and has them refute or support the hypotheses. The best episode I've seen so far has been "Creatures from the 4th Dimension." Here's a synopsis:

Creatures from the 4th Dimension - For decades cameras have been capturing images of a flying, torpedo-like creature. So fast it cannot be seen with the naked eye. Some think it is a military weapon, others believe it may be a creature from another dimension. But just what is it? This MonsterQuest scientific journey will use super high speed photography, physics and even a wind tunnel experiment to shed light on a creature simply referred to as Rods. *from history.com*

What makes MonsterQuest so great, and in particular, this episode the awesomest? Two things: 1) The eyewitness accounts and reenactments are just hilarious (You'll just have to take my word for it and check them out.) and 2) the rods in the "Creatures" episode, turned out to be moths captured on camera.

I admit that my sense of humor may be a bit out of whack right now, but this show rocks. Check it out.

Another Lazy Saturday

I love Saturdays! Today started out with brunch with a grad school friend at a cute restaurant - I had coconut French toast. And now, I'm snuggling on the papasan with Magic, watching the first season of The Ghost Whisperer. I always feel the need to apologize for liking this show, but I won't. I just like it. I know plenty of people who watch absolute garbage! (Hmm, I guess that's a roundabout apology. Heh.) I mostly feel bad about my GW like-affair because The Targo hates it more than should be legal. This is the same man who surfs the Internet for funny video clips to show me, and most of them are so not funny. So, like, whatever: To each his/her own.

Tonight I'm flying solo as The Targo will be at a bar watching college football. We went to the same bar a couple weeks ago for a game and it was beyond smoky. And also, this drunk man, who was at least 6'2", kept tipping over on me. Even after I moved. I had a lousy time. So, I think might wander to Blockbuster and grab the last Pirates of the Caribbean movie. I know most of you said it was bad, but it can't be worse than The Ghost Whisperer, right?

America's Next Top Model Finale

Booo! Um, I mean, Boooo!





This is why I don't usually watch reality(ish) TV shows. Because people like Jaslene win. Yeah... The Cha-Cha Diva is the winner. Now, she's from Chicago... nothing wrong with that, but she was so mean. Not Renee mean... but mean. And, I have to agree with some of the judges comments: she often looked like a drag queen. That aside, she did photograph beautifully. I'll admit to that.


Now, Natasha? She was so sweet. I really got annoyed how they acted like she was so dumb or something. Her English was amazing, but her accent was really thick. When the judges talked about how she "recited" her Cover Girl ad, well, I imagine most people who are English-as-a-Second-Language would choose to do that. So they can capture everything they wanted to say.



The one thing I really do like about ANTM is that the "experts" get to select the winner. Max totally wouldn't have won Grease: You're the One that I Want if the "experts" had chosen the winners. Well, I'd like to think not anyway. Boo.

Am I just being a Negative Nancy or a Crabby McWhineypants? Perhaps. I'll blame it on my cold medicine hangover.

America's Next Top Model - Final 3

My thoughts: I somehow missed last week's episode, where Brittany went all batsh*t crazy. Damn. I loved her! Now, I really don't care. Aside from Jaslene, who I'm pretty sure could kick my arse, I don't have much of an opinion of the girls. I was very disappointed about how the girls completely ganged up on poor Natasha. Yeah, she's strange, but she seems really sweet. Give the girl a break, yo!

What do you guys think? Are you excited about anyone in particular? Is there anyone that needs to go right.damn.now?

TiVo? Did You Betray Me?

Um... Was this week's America's Next Top Model a clip show? That's what I saw on my TiVo. The lameness of that about killed me. They could have updated us in about 20 minutes, or I don't know, online. Why the clip show?

Or, maybe... Was there a second episode on afterward? There may have been but Medium has higher priority according to my backward older generation TiVo model. (Seriously, those of you who can record two things and watch a third... I marvel at that power! WOW!)

I feel all sorts of icky inside. TiVo is a member of my family. The cats are scolded when they touch the TiVo box or get in the way of its remote control awesomeness. *sniff* Did TiVo fail to record a NEW EPISODE OF AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL??? I feel so let down. If I can't trust my TiVo, who can I trust?

Not That I Was a Fan Before

I was channel surfing a couple of weeks ago and stopped on the "Who Will Be the Next Pussycat Doll?" show. Omigod. Let's do the math: singing competition + TV = Marianne sitting on the couch watching her butt grow.

So, um, yeah. I watched... and watched. And hated the contestants. These were some of the most unlikable people on reality TV. WOW. I mean, I can't even tell you one PCD tune aside from that "Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me" song. I think I only know that from commercials and the American Idol reject auditions.

And wouldn't you know it, the most unlikable one of the bunch took home the crown. BOO! BOOO, Asia! That's all I've got to say. It's not quite as disappointing as Max winning the role of Danny in Grease, but it still grinds my gears.

Really, it should embarrass me a bit that I actually wasted hours of my life on this show. UGH.

Genetics

Me: You know, if we ever have kids, I really hope they get your long skinny legs and your self-control.

The Targo: And I really hope they get your crappy taste in TV. It's in your genes!

Me: HEY! You leave The Ghost Whisperer out of this!

Look, I know it's a horrible - HORRIBLE - show, but I just like it for some reason.

A Conversation

Me: I'm don't think I know anything about the battle The 300 is based on.

The Targo: Well, according to Wikipedia...

Me: You know, when you have a PhD, it's probably not okay for you to cite Wikipedia. It's not exactly a scholarly resource.

Because seriously? William Hung has an entry!

Happy and Sad

Seriously, my TV watching has gotten bit over the top. I'll submit a blah-blah-monologue about America's Next Top Model at a later date. Because? Now? I'm talking about Grease! Yay! You're the One that I Want! Rah!

Ok... I'm happy because Exhibit A:

LAURA!

I'm sad because Exhibit B:

Max?! BOOOOOOOOOO! In what universe is this kid Danny? Really?

Well, I had a good run. And while I'm being totally honest, Max or no - I'd still see this darned show given the chance. After all, I did dedicate many Sundays of Tivo to it already.

Stop The Insanity

Cannot. Stop. Watching. America's Next Top Model. Reruns.

Why? I have no clue? I just keep hoping another one doesn't come on!

You're NOT The One We Want?

NO!!!!!!!!!! I can't believe Kate was eliminated. I mean, she isn't my favorite anymore, but she was totally my second favorite! How in the world did this happen?!?!


Okay, I can't believe it happened, but I'm more than sucked in, I'm emotionally invested. I actually cried during the send off (which I think is mean as all get out!*). Why Kate? Why?


While Grease: You're The One That I Want is not as flashy and MTV-esque as American Idol, I really do like it a lot more.

1. As I said in my previous post, no one is mean just because they can be. The criticisms seem mostly constructive. Admittedly though, if it happened to me, I'd cry like a baby.
2. Also, the people are so talented! The contestants are actors, dancers, and singers. "I'm a triple threat!"
   
3. Plus, no one sings those crappy screams that they pretend are notes, like a couple of those stinkers Beyonce et al sang during the Oscars.
4. The songs are mostly ones you know, but the technical skills are important.

So, my prediction for next week: The bottom two will be Allie and Kathleen. I think Kathleen might go home, but I'm think Allie should.

I CANNOT WAIT!!

I still want to slap Max because he's annoying. I still bat my eyelashes at Austin, like he can see me.

Anyhoo, It's a fun twenty minutes of music in betwixt forty minutes of commercials. Thus, it's even better when Tivo'ed! Check it out!

*During the send off, the eliminated Danny is surrounded by the other Dannys while they sing that "Sandy - Can't you see I'm in misery?" song. The Sandys sing the "Look at Me, I'm Sandra Dee" reprise. So super sad. I'm misty just thinking about it.

Hooked

Omigod. I am so hooked. I'm serious. It's becoming a serious problem for me.


Have you seen it?

American Idol can totally bite me. This is so much better! I LOVE LOVE LOVE Grease. As a child of the 80s, I grew up with the Grease soundtrack (on vinyl no less) and the video. Not to mention one network seemed to air it a lot. I can't remember which one. Also, the singing? SO way better than American Idol (well, maybe not better than Kelly Clarkson, but way better than Fantasia). The drama? Yes, there is a mean British guy, but he's not mean for the sake of being mean. It's almost like he can't help himself. But seriously, Olivia Newton John's plastic surgery? That's dramatic (and frightening)! Let's not even talk about the scariness that is Andrew Lloyd Webber. He looks like he hasn't blinked in about ten years.

So, we're down to 5 Dannys and 5 Sandys. I'm pretty sure Kathleen (Spiritual Sandy) and Kevin will be eliminated this week:

After them though, I just don't know. I do know that if Max - AKA Slacker Danny - wins, I'll cry. He's one of those guys I just can't cheer for: he makes no effort, he's too "smooth," and he's no - I repeat NO - John Travolta. I'm just saying.

My favorite is Laura (Small Town Sandy):

She's absolutely adorable and when she sings my eyes tear up. *sniff* In fact, I'm so damned suckered in to this show that 1) I've still got older episodes on my TiVo and 2) I went and rented "Jesus Christ Superstar" after the Broadway (eep! Andrew Lloyd Webber!!) episode.

I'm ridiculously moved by music. I played the saxophone for about 12 years (I'd still play if I didn't live in a 600 square feet mole hole that has paper-thin walls) and was in choir and musicals in junior high and high school. But, I totally cannot sing. Well, that's not quite true. I can sing - about 6 notes. I was always a second alto, which I kidded myself into thinking that I was awesome on the low range... but that's such a lie. Bottom line: I cannot sing and totally want to. I keep imagining if I wasn't old and fat, I could totally be Sandy. The Not So Talented Sandy.